Pokeballs and Locked Doors
by Ice 2 C U
Summary: Red and Blue or Green depending on which name you prefer are trapped in a land infected with a virus that will kill the host unless they ensure that their Wailords use Hydro Pumps daily, preferably in a cute Skitty. They will journey across the land to recruit survivors to bring into their army of cute dudes. YAOI, AND RATED M FOR A REASON. Everyone x Everyone.
1. In a World

"_In a world . . . (etc.)"_

-Don LaFontaine

* * *

"_. . . What's that? Buena's dead?"_

"_Afraid so."_

_Sigh. "All the women are dying from this virus . . . Wanna stay in late to fill in for her show?"_

"_Might as well. No way in hell I'm leaving the radio tower."_

"_I hear you. And if you listeners hear _me_ out there at home, I suggest you do the same. So long as you substitute 'radio tower' with the closest form of shelter available. The virus isn't the only thing to be worried about, so be prepared."_

"_That's not to say you should dismiss the threat of the virus itself, though. We've uncovered new information on how to fight it, but I'm afraid it's not the easiest thing to bring up on live radio."_

"_We know parents out their want to explain the Birds and the Beedrills themselves to their children, so we'll just drop a hint our older viewers will pick up: make sure your Wailords use Hydro Pump daily."_

"_I think that'll just about cover it. But while we're experiencing a small scale apocalypse, how about we listen to a word from our sponsors?"_

_(cut to commercials)_

* * *

Red laid there huddled next to the radio, still under shock from the whole situation. His mother had died from the virus too, seemed like only the young men survived. Pallet Town was completely deserted of life upon his arrival, at least until Blue showed up a few days later. His sister Daisy didn't survive either; predictable, but still terrible. Shame, she had a pretty good career as a pokémon coordinator.

Suddenly, _clang!_

Red jumped back and twirled around towards the door. Just Blue dropping a shovel by the doorstep, with a rolled up t-shirt draped over his shoulder, beads of sweat dotting across his bare chest. "Doesn't look . . . like we'll be worrying about zombies. . ." he panted with a weak smile, dragging his feet over to collapse on the couch. Red sighed in relief and smiled warmly, the radio warnings had screwed with his nerves lately. Bodies are disposed of now, though, that's at least one chore of this new lifestyle completed. He dove into the kitchen to retrieve a bottle of water for his exhausted friend, who took it eagerly and started chugging right away, only pausing from the binge to ask something. "Uh, hey Red? Mind if I get comfortable?"

He blinked. "The fan's on all the way up."

Blue chuckled. "I'm talking about my pants, silly."

Red's face blushed, well, red. "I, umm . . . well, it's not like I'd be looking . . ."

With his approval, Blue unbuttoned his jeans and slid them down his legs, kicking them off into the floor under the coffee table. "You don't mind being dirty, do you?"

". . . W-what?" he stammered out, trying to avoid looking at his lower body.

"Me sprawling my clothes everywhere, making everything untidy." He laughed and ruffled Red's hair. "What's with you anyway? You figure I meant something weird when I brought up being dirty." He said, taking another swig from the water bottle. He saw Red cringe at the word again, and then he put together the obvious puzzle. That means he burst out cackling and spilled the water contents all over his body.

Though giggling a bit despite his nervousness, Red became a bit alarmed when the rival soaked himself. He scoured his eyes around to see if there was a towel nearby, but of course there wouldn't be one in the living room. He jumped on the problem quickly and hoisted up his shirt as well as a makeshift towel to dry Blue with instead.

Since the color blue wasn't an available healthy color for Blue to turn into, he had to settle with turning red as well. "Huh? Wait, no you don't have to . . ." he tried to mutter out, but the urge to resist was drowned out by the thrill of Red's soothing touch over his body. He leaned himself back to lay against the couch while holding back moans, as Red climbed on top to continue doing his job, wiping every inch of his torso.

"We better not catch a cold," said Red, "It's not like doctors will be an option for a while. Now to get you a dry pair of boxers . . ." he then looked down to examine them. Of course it was wet, but there was also a different kind of wet in it. A dab of precum at the tip of a steadily rising size from underneath the cloth. Both of them flinched at the discovery, but after some hesitation Red threw his hand blindly around the waistband to drag the boxers down, unleashing the member's full size once it was released from its restraints.

"Wait! Hold on!" Blue spat out, but went ignored as Red tugged around it and jerked furiously.

"Sorry, sorry . . ." Red whimpered as he worked on it. "The virus. I think you caught it, you know those reports of the first victims that died in masses with erections?"

Blue remembered how he laughed hearing that news broadcast then, before he knew it would lead to all this. "Wait, so . . . the virus makes dudes explode from sperm, or something?"

"I don't know, I don't know, but I figure I might as well take a shot instead of having you die on me . . ."

Blue pondered over the whole idea for a moment as Red tended to his body. "But . . . wait, you're just shaking it like some sort of . . . shakey thing." He scratched the back of his neck, trying to figure out the best way to get the message across. "I mean, I could just fap like that on my own."

Red ceased for a moment and looked up to him, somewhat disappointed. "Wouldn't you need a little help? You know . . ." he made an uncomfortable face. ". . . Umm, that'd just be . . . premature ejaculation. I think we need to get as much out as we can in one go."

Blue looked down upon him and sighed. "Alright, alright. Save my ass from dying, I guess. But come on, don't just jerk at it like that. There's not too much buildup that way."

Red groaned. "Fine, Mr. Bossy." He mumbled, ducking down to start licking up and down the shaft, and made sure to coat every inch of his rod with a warm, sticky layer. Blue's legs squirmed in his seat so Red had to latch on with a firm grip and kneaded him gently. As Blue finally released moans that swam through his body, Red wrapped his lips around the shaft to make him moan even harder. Blue stroked his hair as his head bobbed up and down sucking on him, and made a quick grab at the ass to make him loosen a muffled squeak. After much teasing inside Red's warm, wet mouth, he couldn't take it anymore.

"Wailord, use Hydro Pump!" Blue called out, releasing his precious bodily fluids down his rival's throat. Red eagerly gulped down the essence, tasting its slimy yet satisfying flavor. He reemerged and took a few deep breaths, with a string of cum still dripping down his chin.

"Mmm . . . it's super effective . . ."

One late jet of cum came splattering on Red's pecs, but that seemed to be the last of it. "Heh. What would you call that, a critical hit?"

Red shrugged and rubbed the essence over his chest. "I dunno, I'm just gonna call it _sexy." _The comment made Blue smirk and tug him close to wrap an arm around him, where Red rested his head on his shoulder. He looked down at the member again and realized it reverted to its normal state. "Umm . . . looks like you didn't have the virus after all."

Blue pinched his eyebrows and followed where Red's gaze pointed towards. "Heh. Gee, I wonder where I might've possibly gotten hard?"

Red slung a playful punch to the gut. "Shut up, you know I turned you on."

Blue chuckled and licked some of his own cum off of Red's chin. "Sure, whatever."

* * *

**A/N****:** Alright dudes, I'm hoping this one's gonna be a long runner, so I'll be updating on it whenever I get horneh. (also known as maybe friggin ALWAYS? Possibly?) This should expand to encompass all the sexy pokedudes that I can fit in, so at a later point you can make some suggestions as to who should make an appearance. It's too early in to start picking some out of course, with just Red and Blue here at the moment, I'll give the go ahead to make request once the cast gets leveled out. But what you _can_ suggest in reviews at any time is what kind of sexy situations I should put these guys in~! So that means reading the reviews of this fic isn't for the faint of heart ;) (or reading the fic itself, of course)


	2. Natural Selection

"_It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.__"_

-Charles Darwin

* * *

A few weeks into the epidemic, survivors started to get harder and harder to find. Most lights are still shining, can't count on relying on them too much longer, power plants can't sustain themselves forever. Small packs of wild pokemon penetrated their way into the depths of Goldenrod; soon they'll overrun the streets without the rangers to keep the population in check. Just a group of three Raticate and such feasting on the mostly fresh corpses for now, but soon the situation will be closer to a stampede of Tauros parading everywhere. Indigo could only see his lab assistant Silver by his side through his orange tinted goggles, which made him resemble Matt from Death Note when he wore them, but Death Note most likely did not exist in the Pokemon universe, so Silver couldn't really understand the similarities. Both wore disposable masks to protect themselves from the virus.

Though still preoccupied with their meal, he'd better get some practice with his flicking arm, so Indigo brandished out his electric Rattan Whip and lashed it at a Raticate's back, which reacted naturally by swirling backwards to loosen a sheer growl. Silver brandished a knife but Indigo gestured a hand back to him in an order for him to stand back, so the red haired boy reluctantly did so.

One rat charged, Indigo waited until the second came next to lasso that one's leg and yank the whip over to trip the first in mid-run, dazing both of them with a surge of thundershock as the third and last one found itself caught between the rope that tied the two captured rodents. Before it could run off, Indigo reeled the whip back into his device to drag the last victim into the cluster, and once all were bonded in one convenient package he raised the voltage to electrocute the scavengers into fainting.

"Survival of the fittest." He said to Silver, pulling the whip back in to holster it under the fabric of his lab coat. The two continued onward.

The Goldenrod Radio Tower came into Indy's view as he approached the structure, but upon closer inspection it didn't look like he'd be able to give his reports of the virus over a broadcast. The surrounding grounds of the skyscraper were littered with jagged shards of glass. Every once in a while a few more of the crystal arrows rained down from the upper floors, that couldn't be a good sign.

Another blizzard of glass sprinkled down to the pavement, and so did a- OH SHIT A TYRANITAR! Indy nearly stumbled taking a step back from the tremor the Tyranitar made upon his crash landing, and scrambled for cover behind the nearest abandoned car. His whip couldn't penetrate that kind of armor. Him and Silver had to get out of . . . Silver? Indy frantically scoured the perimeter, no sight of the boy. He growled. Stupid kid, he's gonna get himself killed . . .

The perversity of the universe always tends toward a maximum, so naturally something else had to go wrong too, and it did once a Slaking plummeted downwards after the fallen Tyranitar, slamming the pokemon with a Giga Impact hard enough to puncture a small crater into the cement and bust every fragile object within the perimeter of the resulting quake. The giant ape kept pounding on the pinned down Tyranitar, showing no signs of slowing down. Must be the virus giving it extra energy, otherwise it'd slack off in the middle of the fight more often. Yes, this was quite a very bad situation indeed.

Indy slipped behind cover from car to car while the nearby battle distracted the brutish pokemon. He raced into one of the buildings and climbed his way up to the rooftops, he'd have a better chance of finding Silver at a bird's eye view. He only took time to make a few breaths to replenish some energy before he peeped out from cover of the rooftop to see what was out. The Tyranitar down there had gotten back up on his feet and is holding his ground against the unrelenting Slaking. Still no Silver, though. He groaned and ran across the rooftops, using the Rattan Whip to swing across the flagpoles as he scanned the streets for any sign of him. No view, but something else: a faint ringing noise in the distance.

He made his way towards the sound; hopefully he'd make it there before those two monsters got a chance to hear it. He stumbled upon a building marked with a sign that read '_FRIENDSHIP STORE: WE SELL PROPS!' _The windows were busted open, and the alarm bells were blaring inside. He squinted to see if there were any signs of movement past the windows, and every once in a while turned back to see if the brawl downstairs got any closer—and it did. Damn animals, can't their fighting take them to the other side of the street? They're gonna stumble into this trouble magnet of a store sooner or later. He peered back into the building one last time to make sure nobody was there. But no, turned out he finally spotted Silver wandering about in the place. He's gonna get himself killed! Indy wanted to yell out to him, but that'd draw even more attention. He'd have to drag those pokemon away from here.

He descended down to the street level and pulled out his modified Pokégear to hack into a nearby motorcycle and automatically hotwire it, leading the motorcycle to pull up next to Indy in wait like a trusty steed. He hopped in and the ride gave a motor-powered neigh as he galloped away at high speeds. After zooming past the two brutes, they lost focus on clobbering each other and chased after the new speeding target.

As they chased him, Indy lassoed the whip around a flagpole and looped around it in the air, ramming the Slaking square in the back in the swing downwards. The impact thumped against the bike roughly, but it resulted in the angry gorilla getting sent flying skyward into a crash through a faraway building. The whip's grip broke though, sending him off balance in midair, but he regained the balance by riding along the sides of a wall and then came back to the road to take care of the Tyranitar.

Hacking while driving was probably illegal, but it's not like he'd get arrested for it. He pulled out the Pokégear again to hack into the rest of the nearby vehicles to direct them to drive alongside him. He tried piloting some trucks to ram into the pursuing Tyranitar, but he kept dodging the incoming vehicles. Once he found a wide open intersection, he braked to a halt in the center to await the opponent.

Once he got around range, he steered the rest of the cars to enclose the perimeter in a circle that surrounded the Tyranitar, while he watched the beast try to escape, but the ring of vehicles kept closing in on the creature until they suddenly crashed together and blasted into a huge explosion that splattered the pokemon's giblets all over the place.

Indy winced as the blood splattered all over him, but no time to worry about that. He spotted the Slaking in the distance, somehow still alive and charging down the cramped streets. Indy stayed back and returned to his trusty Pokégear to aid him one more time. He summoned the remaining cars in the area to focus their battering on the last few buildings on the street. He waited for the moment where Slaking would cross their path and activated the device, leading the vehicles to bulldoze their way through the walls and crash inside, toppling the structures down in a chain reaction that flooded tons of rubble onto the unfortunate ape pokemon.

It dug its way out from the rubble, but its victory didn't last long when it tripped down the pile and landed face first on the ground. It struggled up and dragged its feet in Indy's direction, but the newly red painted human just smirked and disembarked the bike, walking towards the beast and delivering a roundhouse kick to the pokemon's face. It toppled over and didn't get back up.

Indy kissed the Pokégear. "Thank you, Science!"

* * *

Indy stomped his way into the Friendship Store, whip in hand and ready to use it. After rumbling through the clothes racks of the costumes section he stumbled upon Silver clad in . . . assless leather chaps? Whatever, that'd make the whipping cut in even deeper. He didn't notice Indy though, being preoccupied with taking off his shirt to try something else on. He had on earplugs too, no doubt to protect his ears from the alarm he sprung, thankfully Indy disabled it on his way in, Silver just didn't get the memo that the coast was clear for his ears now. A pair of kitty ears were shown off openly though.

Sneaking up from behind, he cracked his whip into Silver's exposed rear, unleashing a sudden shriek from the boy as he turned around to look at the perpetrator and rub his bruise. "Eugh . . . Geez, that felt like I wasn't wearing anything at all on my butt . . ." he said, seemingly not aware that his pants revealed his body.

Indy crossed his arms and glared. "I should've turned the charge on the Rattan Whip for you scaring me like that. You could've gotten yourself killed with that alarm giving yourself away for miles!"

Silver frowned. "I'm sorry, but . . . what, you're bleeding-"

"It's not my blood, it's something else's." Indy interrupted. "All because I was _protecting you." _In the middle of the lecture he spotted a collar and leash nearby, and proceeded to take and latch it onto Silver's neck. "Now you better not leave my site like that again." Silver groaned at him, but Indy tugged at the leash to get him moving. "Come on now Silver, your first chore under punishment is cleaning all this blood off of me."

Indy dragged Silver over to the nearest bathroom in the building and proceeded to unbutton his lab coat and pull off his shirt to reveal his muscular abs. "Blood's a hard substance to get off; you'll have to put extra attention in the scrubbing.

Silver nodded and pumped out some soap to rub against his chest, and turned the sink's water on to splash some on him to start cleaning. The amateur thief's hands felt so good on his body . . . rubbing against every nook and cranny with his soft touch. Something in his pants began to stiffen, but he didn't want to embarrass the both of them if Silver stumbled into it.

"Uh, oh no! My mask is falling off!" Indy said, clearly ripping off the mask willingly while Silver was distracted with cleaning his body. He wasted no time in unzipping his pants and releasing his member to rise up in front of Silver's face. "Quick, tend to it, it's got the virus!"

Silver flinched at the object that suddenly showed up in front of his face. He blushed and squired around, trying to think of alternatives, but there were none, and so he took the shaft into his hands and began to rub him tenderly. Indy let out satisfied moans as Silver played with his cock for the next few minutes, only stopping for a second to get some warm water from the sink to soak it with. Silver's hands glided over the wet rod as he tugged at it faster and faster while Indy ran a hand through his long red hair.

Then Silver had another idea and rummaged through the bag of things he collected in the place, pulling out some mittens that matched his kitty ears, and he put them onto his hands to finish the job. "Ohh . . . it tickles . . ." Indy moaned as Indy jerked furiously until suddenly he splattered a shot of cum across his chest, making Silver flinch back. "Heh . . . I would've done it in your face if you didn't have that mask on." Silver blushed even harder. Indy looked back to the bag. "So what else is in there?"

". . . a kitty tail. I don't know how I'm supposed to put it on though."

Indy grinned slyly when he pulled the tail out of the bag, knowing full well what it was. He jammed the tail-like anal plug inside Silver, prompting a shriek from the sudden maneuver. "To protect your ass from the virus." Indy said before Silver could protest, mostly just making it up so he could see him wearing it everywhere. Silver sighed and accepted the accessory in him. He walked over to get a paper towel to wipe the semen off of him, but Indy grabbed his wrist to stop him. "Nope, no. I want to see if skin exposure will transmit the virus. Besides, this can be part of your punishment."

With that, Indy yanked at the leash to get his cum-drenched companion to follow. His old lab coat was ruined, so he picked out a new one from the racks that was long enough to cover his body. That'd come in handy, he wouldn't want to strain himself in pants all day. It'd need to be exposed for him to get Silver to tend to him at a moment's notice. He snuck a peek at Silver's ass and slipped another grin. Not all viruses were bad.

* * *

**A/N****: **Wow, that included more explosions than I intended for a lemon. Hope you dudes enjoyed the chapter~!


	3. The Noodle Incident

_Pasta . . . Water. . ._

_Getting. . . Hotter . . ._

_A song about noodles?_

_(No!)_

-Adventure Time

* * *

Nothing but static on the radio today, that can't be a good sign. He heard a few roaring sounds in the last minutes of the broadcast, then all communication was abruptly cut off. All of civilization's suddenly been put on pause, not a single soul mingling about in Pallet besides Red and Blue. Even most of the pokemon were gone, since the two released them from their pens in Oak's pasture once all the food they could scavenge in town started running dry. Hopefully they'd find their way around the wild on their own, after being raised by scientists all the time. Around the time the cooped up pokemon left, a couple small packs of ferals came in and scampered their way around, which the human occupants managed to avoid confrontation with for now. They made sure to train their pokemon in preparation to defend themselves if any future situation called for it, but of course that worked up the appetites of the pocket monsters, draining their stockpiles even faster.

They couldn't survive on Pallet Town alone too much longer. Before the epidemic, the town relied on Viridian and Cinnabar to meet its supply needs. Cinnabar would probably be pretty safe, at least when it comes to wild pokemon, but neither of them had a clue how to operate a boat, so for now they'd have to postpone plans of voyaging there. Viridian would definitely have a goldmine of necessities that they could salvage, but that's the exact same reason it'd be a minefield of danger as well.

For instance, most people would run to the local gun store the moment they hear news about a zombie outbreak. Sounds reasonable, everyone would need a weapon of their own to defend themselves, and everything that isn't nailed down will be up for grabs. Problem is, _other_ people think the exact same thing, so they'll turn up at the same gun store too. If the shop owner's still kicking, he won't respond too kindly to a mob trying to clamor themselves through the front door, and he'd already be trained in sharpshooting well before anyone else decided they needed to go on a zombie killing adventure. The place will already be barricaded as an impenetrable fortress that's just taunting any lunatic to drop in to a trap at point blank range.

But even then, the guy in charge of the shop isn't the thing to be wary of the most at the spot. The people outside, _especially _the ones who've yet to bear arms, will grow paranoid every second they wait in line at the all you can eat lead buffet. If the crowd does manage to blockade the exits long enough to make the owner surrender, there'll be a Mexican standoff the moment someone grabs a firearm inside. To put a long story short, the zombies may be pretty gruesome monsters, but humans will always be the biggest ones. Even in the face of a common enemy that's incapable of compromise, they'll continue to squabble amongst themselves. So long as there's two men left on the planet, one man's going to want another man to be dead.

. . . Yeah, in that case they better find some other survivors soon, so long as they keep making preparations for an assault on Viridian if needed. They've been working hard for the past month and a half pulling their resources together. It'll be time to make their move soon.

* * *

Dry noodles rattled like rumbling rocks as Blue made his way in while shaking the box. "Yo Red, I found some spaghetti!"

Red looked back at him, then back to his Venusaur. "Okay Saur, we're done for now!" The pokemon moaned out and nodded, wandering away from Blue's Machamp that it was busy training against and going elsewhere in town to idle itself. He walked up to Blue and smiled. "Sounds yum, do we have any sauce?"

He pulled out a can from his pocket and brandished it out. "Got some tomato soup, that's sorta like sauce, right? Tomato, tomahto, whatever."

Red chuckled. "I'm sure it'll be fine."

They went back inside Red's house and started to boil the noodles and make the soup, and Blue drifted away as Red prepared the meal inside. Neither of them could really fill in the role of the woman of the house, so of course all the dishes would be perpetually filthy, where they'd only fix themselves up a dish when it was needed at that exact moment. In the end, Red managed to scrape himself a plate full of spaghetti and poured the way-too-thin sauce over it. He laid it on the table along with glasses of tap water and peeked out through the door outside to call out Blue's name to come back in, and momentarily they both sat down to start on the meal.

Blue glanced at it once he was settled down and noticed how Red's plate had a much larger pile of noodles than his. "That's amore for you, but what about me?"

He was about to lunge his fork into the plate until he was caught by the comment. ". . . Huh?"

"Well, it's a song that sounds like it'd be in _Lady and the Tramp,_ and 'amore' as in you have a-more than me, I think it's called a pun, or a play on words, or something like that."

Red looked down at his plate, and realized that it was the only plate on the table. "Oh, I see. About the whole hogging all the food to myself thing, but I disagree with the whole Lady and the Tramp thing, at least when it comes to its relations to the song 'That's Amore.'"

Blue laughed. "Okay, but I still stand by my idea that any time featuring spaghetti can be linked to that iconic scene, _especially _when romantic tension is involved."

Red blushed a bit and tilted back in his seat. "Ermm . . . that was just a freakout thing I did thinking you were dying, you know . . ."

He chuckled more. "Yeah, yeah. But we're going to eventually get out of Pallet, aren't we?" Red nodded. "Then that means we're pretty much guaranteed to catch the virus sooner or later, right? Like it or not, we'll need to adapt."

Red turned silent. ". . . So are we having a Seinfeldian conversation about whether or not a Dean Martin song fits in with a Disney movie, or are we talking about . . . that kind of stuff . . ."

Blue hoisted up and took a seat on Red's side of the table, and placed a hand around his shoulder. "Of course we have to talk about that stuff, it's a life or death deal. It'll be hard adjusting, I know that, but if we're going to have a hard time getting used to thing, we'll be having a hard time together. As far as dudes go, I'd probably be most comfortable with experiencing this with you."

Red avoided eye contact, but nodded. "Thanks, I guess. . ."

Blue reached a hand up to tilt Red's chin to make him look him in the eyes, making Red falter back. "I mean it, and I'll be sure to make this as easy on you as I possibly can. . ." he thought a moment for something to say that could lighten the mood, and grinned when an idea hatched. "Besides, you'll be just fine with everything once I seduce you, and that shouldn't be so hard."

Red slipped a chuckle that let him look back into Blue with more ease. "My, aren't you boastful? Let me see if you're successful in that."

"Challenge accepted," he said, going back to his side of the table to start digging into the spaghetti. He peered back into it and sighed. "Hmm, another problem. No meatballs."

Red raised an eyebrow. "Is that a problem?"

Blue nodded. "Of course . . . because . . . you know, _meatballs._ Meat. Balls."

He rolled his eyes. "If you have to use sexual innuendo, be a bit better at it."

Blue smirked wider. "Yeah, but wouldn't it be nice to see me lick at them suggestively?"

Red shook his head. "They look gross though. If you're going for stuff like that, I'd suggest a banana." He sighed and facepalmed. "And what kind of seduction is this? Pretty pathetic seduction if you ask me."

"Yes, but everyone falls for the funny guy. Sure, the main source of humor in this exchange is the fact that the humor itself is terrible, but nonetheless it's still amusing, right?"

Red chuckled. "Sure, let's go with that."

Blue leaned over the table towards Red, leading him to squirm back in his chair a little. "Tell you what: if I manage to eat my entire plate before you're done with yours, we get to share the rest of your spaghetti like those cute little dogs, which might lead to something interesting. Sound like a good wager?"

"Pfft, you know I'm the fastest eater around, I could eat _ten _dishes full before you get a chance to slurp one noodle." He held out a hand. "May the best man win." Blue accepted the handshake and the both of them readied their eating utensils. "On your mark . . . get set . . . go!"

Both of them pounced into their meals to stated digging the second it was time to start. After a few mouthfuls, Blue felt the urge to gag, but since he _really _needed to win this, he made himself swallow it down. "Whoa, time out, time out! This shit is terrible!"

Red looked up to him, still slurping down a bundle of the spaghetti connected to the rest of the entanglement. He sucked the strands he had in his mouth, but resisted getting more in honor of the temporary truce. "What? Of course it's terrible; tomato soup is hardly a replacement for real sauce."

He gave him a quizzical look, surprised by how little Red minded the abomination of cooking they had. "But . . ." he sighed and resumed mowing down the food, leading Red to jump back in as well. They sloppily forced it down their mouths as fast as they could, where much spilling took place that dropped down and stained them all over their shirts. Not that they had time to pay attention to cleanup up after themselves, they had a race to finish.

Eventually Blue made it to the finish line, nearly choking in the process when he had to catch up with Red's eating skills. He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms with a sly grin of accomplishment. "Looks like I won."

He examined his tray and just realized he had been beaten at his own game. He sighed, seeing how he only had about three more spoonfuls till he would've been done, but he wasn't ready to admit he had failed just yet. "H-hey!" Red stammered, "I mean, come on—I had like three times as much as you, it isn't fair!"

Blue stuck his tongue out at him. "Aren't you the boastful one that claimed to eat ten plates before I could get a bite done?"

Red fidgeted back and lowered his head in defeat. "But . . . fine, I guess you win, serves me right to think I could win a bet against the house. . ."

Blue leaned over the table to get some of Red's pasta. "You be the lady, I'll be the tramp."

He blushed. "W-why do I have to be the lady? I want to be the . . ." he blushed even redder. "Well, tramp isn't that much better . . ."

Blue laughed and took a cluster of strands and put one end in his mouth as he urged the other boy to do the same on the other end. They both slurped on the noodles and managed to be pulled slightly towards each other, but before any physical contact could be made the limp chain broke apart and went down each other's throats. "Gee, that's a relief." Red said, trying to back out from any more.

Blue shook his head and reached out to yank Red's shirt collar to make him hover back over the plate. "Let's try this again, shall we?"

Red tried to squirm away, so Blue had to babyfeed some of the noodles in order to make him cooperate. They managed to pull all the way up to each other's lips, but Red forced himself to jerk away at the last minute before they could make contact. Blue didn't want to go down without a fight though, so he hopped up on top of the table to keep up with the strand. Surprised, Red simply let go of his mouth's grasp on the noodle and let Blue slurp the rest of it down his throat.

Blue groaned at Red's refusal to give in, but nonetheless finished what he had in his mouth. "Hmm . . . well, at least I got to taste some of your mouth juice from your half of the spaghetti . . ."

Red blushed even hotter, both staring at how he climbed up on the table and his talk about his saliva. And, well, every single other thing going on at the moment. "I . . . I don't know about the whole kissing thing . . ."

Blue pounced forward and planted a kiss on Red's cheek before he could react. Red, now as tainted red in the face that could possibly be maintained, fell back in his chair and into the floor. "B-Blue!"

He giggled and dropped down on the table to land on top of Red, urging a screech from the younger trainer. "Now, now, you ruined my idea of screwing you on top of the table since you decided to go and plop on the floor like that! Maybe some other time . . ." he smirked and started to knead at Red's shoulders. Red tried to wiggle away, though he couldn't help but stifle a moan as he soothingly touched his body. After Blue crept a hand up his shirt, he noticed all the stains embedded in it. "Wow, no wonder you finished so fast, half the spaghetti's littered all over your shirt . . ." he whispered into Red's ear, making the smaller one blush. He slipped the cloth off from his torso and immediately lunged his hands at him to play with his nipples, making Red wriggle in between his arms. Blue snickered right into Red's ear and bit into it.

Red cried out in pain, releasing a single tear that leaked down his cheek. "Blue . . . I don't want this . . ."

Blue laid a gentle hand on Red to comfortingly rub against his thigh. He trailed his other palm up against his chest and felt the pounding sensation of his steadily rising heartbeat. He progressed from his thigh to stroke against his lap, then climbed up a growing lump sprouting from Red's groin, making him chuckle in his ear some more. "Maybe you don't want this, but I know your body wants it . . ." He licked behind his ear and unzipped his pants to fish out the stiff member constrained by his boxers. He massaged the shaft and Red tried to flail himself out of Blue's arms, but to no avail. He tucked a finger under the cloth to tickle the flesh underneath for a while, then dug the rest of his hand under the boxers to grip around the base to knead it into hardening further.

As Red cringed against the violation, Blue clinched the waistband of the pants and dragged them down to reveal all his private parts below, and grinded his crotch against Red's rump to tease himself into getting erect. He prodded his rod against his body before he finally released his shaft and suddenly penetrated him. Red screeched out and murmured as Blue thrusted in and out of him. He tightened a firm grip on his legs and hoisted himself up to his feet so he could screw Red with his ass jutted in the air.

He whined more as Blue used him like a toy, clinging to the legs of the dining table so the top half of his body wouldn't have to face as much of a burden against the cold, hard floor tiles. Unfortunately the table was a poorly assembled IKEA one, so the legs couldn't bear the force and toppled over, leaning the top over with the disabled support and spilling the rest of the spaghetti pot all over Red's back. Before the pot could topple to the ground, Blue dragged his body away to avoid the avalanche of dishes that clattered all over the floor. The plates crashed into bits right where Red once laid, and just barely missed catching him in the shrapnel.

Blue spanked him sharply on the rear as he kept humping him. "Hey, didn't I just say I wanted to fuck you on a table later!?"

Red whimpered on the floor from the shock of the calamity and struggled to hold back sobs. "B-b-but . . . it's a sucky table . . . we would've broken our necks if we did th-that . . ."

He thought about the logic for a minute, then sighed when he realized he made an unnecessary outburst. Blue made sure to finish up the pounding on Red and released his pent up fluids to let it seep inside of him. Red moaned louder as Blue finished his job and collapsed his rear on the ground. He still seemed shaken up by everything, so Blue kneeled down to begin licking the spaghetti off of his back. Red was caught off guard, but in a mildly pleasant way this time. ". . . Wait, don' you hate my spaghetti?"

Blue hesitated for a second and tried to think of something to say. "Well . . . it just needed a little secret ingredient . . ." he prepared to hold back any groans he might make at his own comment he was prepared to say. " . . . And that ingredient is _you."_

Red felt the corniness too, but nonetheless accepted the diabetes-inducing sweetness as being the thought that counts. He flipped to his side and wrapped Blue in an embrace. Blue certainly didn't expect it, but went with it and cuddled with him for the next few minutes. After they both shared the long hug sprawled on the floor, Blue eased away and went to go fetch a broom. "You go train the team, Red. I'll clean up this mess."

Red faintly looked at Blue, leaking a soft smile as he made his way out of the house.

* * *

**A/N:** Bleh, I've been pretty busy. I'll be busy again by the time November rolls around too, since I'm going to enter NaNoWriMo, and after that I'll still have a few other fics that'll have higher priority. Don't worry though, this fic should stay around as my backup plan, since it's easy to write for. After NaNo I want to stay in a constant cycle of writing, so I still expect to dabble in this whenever I need a headstart for muse. So yeah, until next time


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